Country mouse attends sports day

After months of stress, both our boys completed their exams last week. Just one week after the half-term holiday, the end of exams means they’ve finished going to school for the rest of the school year or, in Harry’s case, for ever.

It seems a shame that they’re not taught some life skill such as how a car works or even some good, old-fashioned woodwork in what remains of the term. After all, as a parent, you pay the full term’s fee for the summer term. It seems that schools want to get rid of A-level and GCSE students as fast as possible.

However, everyone is supposed to be back at school for the open/sports day. This is extremely dangerous for parents. Suddenly, you find yourselves egged on to compete in the father’s race and, instead of gamboling along at the back at a pace to suit your fitness, you come over all competitive. And, yes, that was your Achilles tendon that went twang.

One friend survived the race unscathed, but, during the sprint, torrents of cash flew from his trouser pockets. When bending down to pick up a £1 coin, he did his back in.