Audi RS3: The devil in a green dress

For many people of a certain generation, the ‘hot hatch’ is an object of reverence. Some of us grew up with different icons. Older folk will remember the glories of the Ford Escort Cosworth and the original Golf GTI. Younger folk might be more taken by the Hyundai Ioniq 5N or the Mercedes AMG A45. I grew up somewhere in the middle, and my princes went by the name of the Honda Civic Type R and the Audi RS3.

There was always something tempting about the car that was a wolf in sheep’s clothing. A cute little hatchback with 300bhp and a sub-7-second 0-62mph time. While it might be fair to argue that the Honda, with its aggressive styling and association with tracksuit-wearing terrorisers of McDonald's carparks, was hardly ever subtle, the Audi certainly fit the mould. There were hints at the Audi’s true power for those with eyes to see — a splash of carbon here, an extra exhaust there — but to most, it just resembled a normal A3 going about its business. Where the Honda was Rambo, a muscled blood-drenched fighting machine, the RS3 was John Wick — elegant, refined, but with plenty of lethality should you have ever needed it.

Alas, the age of the hot hatch is reaching something of a nadir. Environmental targets and petrol-powered performance generally do not mix. The latest RS3, which I drove at the beginning of the month, might be one of the last Audis to use its legendary five-cylinder engine. But as a potential last hurrah goes, the 2025 RS3 gives it a fine send-off.

First up, the car just looks right. Hints of performance can be found in the large and pointy front end, with its wide grille, buff side intakes and carbon splitter. At the back, a split spoiler hugs the roof, while a medium-sized diffuser houses two large exhaust pipes on either side. Otherwise, the car resembles a relatively normal A3, which was already a pleasing looking car.

Inside, things are slightly less subtle, with a racing style wheel with flat bits on the top and bottom, and chrome-trim pedals. The rest of the interior is distinctly Audi-like, which is to say it is serious, slick, functional and comfortable. The infotainment system does what you want it to (although trying to get the radio to play at the same time as Apple CarPlay took longer to figure out than I would like) and the seats were comfortable. The RS3 is a five-door, but it might be difficult to get five-full size adults in the car, and the boot isn’t exactly enormous at 282 litres, but it’s big enough.

On the road, it does the simple things of ‘being an Audi’ well. It is small enough to zip around the city and, despite its sportiness, handles the battered asphalt of urban decay well enough. On the motorway, it will happily pootle wherever you need to go, although the rather thin Pirelli P Zero Rs it wears are a dash noisy — solution: turn up the volume on the as-standard Sonos soundsystem (or the optional Bang & Olufsen system).

So it does the ‘hatchback’ part well, which should hardly be surprising since the good folk at Audi have had plenty of time to perfect the A3 base. But what about the ‘hot’ bit? Where does the RS3 rank on the Scoville scale?

It is — and casual readers please excuse me for using such a technical term — a ‘spicy meatball’. The 2.5-litre engine is a sensational thing to put in a car such as this, and combined with a Quattro system and the medievally-named ‘torque splitter’, the finished item is an absolute joy to drive when the kids have been dropped off at school and the road opens up ahead of you.

There is grip for miles, there is snarl, and there is speed. Like many modern cars, there’s plenty of technology here to keep yourself safe, which is always useful, but none of it is particularly overbearing. It’s a real ‘point-and-shoot’ kind of car, one that can be enjoyed by proper drivers or semi-novices such as myself. The numbers are good. A 0-62mph time of 3.8 seconds comes from 400bhp. A limited top speed of 155mph, which it could surely breeze past if it were allowed.

There are some downsides to the car. As mentioned, the ride can be a little firm when you don’t necessarily want that, and the tires can be noisy. And a starting price of £61,000 is hardly cheap for a hatchback. But even if a car is supposed to be two things at once, one of those things will take precedence over the other. It’s pretty clear which side of the RS3 won out here.

My weekend involved a visit to Wilderness Festival, which is a bit like turning up to a baby shower holding a hand grenade. There are very few things I enjoy more than a fancy festival, but the drive there and back might have taken top billing (sorry Orbital). Sometimes you are told to never meet your heroes. But I was extremely glad to have met the RS3.

On the road: Audi RS3 Sportback

Price: From £61,525

Top speed: 155mph (limited)

0-62mph: 3.8 seconds

Power: 400bhp

Economy: about 30mpg (will be lower if you drive it properly)