The death of Gentleman's Relish (and how I learned to stop worrying and make my own instead)

So, farewell then, Gentleman’s Relish, that splendidly pungent spiced anchovy spread, stalwart of the savoury and best friend to buttered toast. Launched in 1828 by John Osborn, a Briton living in Paris — and formally known as Patum Peperium, a Latin and Greek hodgepodge meaning ‘paste of peppers’ — its demise was announced last month by owners AB World Foods.

‘Although we recognise that this Victorian relish has a niche and loyal following,’ the company said, ‘it sadly does not have wider commercial appeal and, despite our best efforts, retailer distribution has dwindled.’

AB World Foods may have hoped the news would go gentle into that good night, but the company didn’t count upon the thousands of passionate Patum Peperium devotees who raged, raged, against the dying of this salty bite. Garments were rended, teeth were gnashed and many a saline tear was shed, to such an extent that there are whispers of talks underway to discuss its survival. For this magnificent mix of anchovy fillets, butter and a top-secret blend of herbs and spices is no mere toast topper, but rather the pride of Britain in spreadable form, the culinary equivalent of an umami sucker punch.

Ok, so Gentleman’s Relish may not win any prizes for looks, being a glum, muddy brown, with a pong more suited to cat sanctuaries than kitchen. But, spread ‘sparingly’ (as the packaging demands) on hot, toasted cheap white bread, this is a teatime treat and late-night snack like no other — a taste of an age long passed.

As a store-cupboard ingredient, too, Gentleman’s Relish is unparallelled, adding gentle depth to roast lamb, Scotch woodcock, scrambled egg, Welsh rarebits, stew, braises and gravy alike. Anywhere, in fact, you’d use preserved anchovy. Sudi Pigott, anchovy aficionado and author of the excellent new book Consider the Anchovy (Headline, £20), has long adored its ‘funky savouriness’. She tells me that the original recipe was made with a whopping 60% Spanish Cantabrian anchovies, ‘although probably not the highest spring quality, when prices were at their peak, rather [those caught in] later June and September’. Still, these were some of the best anchovies on earth, mixed with that ‘secret blend’ of herbs and spices, which probably included ‘classic Victorian flavours’, such as nutmeg, mace, cayenne and black pepper.

Pigott, however, was certainly not a fan of the most recent incarnation of Gentleman’s Relish and fears that corners may have been cut. ‘I doubt very much, without knowing for certain, that the current iteration manufactured in Poland was even made from European anchovies,’ she whispers. ‘I suspect it uses much less expensive South American or Moroccan fish, which simply don’t have the plump complexity of flavour.’ For her, the new recipe is ‘not at all the same. It tastes like a soapy, fusty old boot room’.

She, like me, prefers the ‘vastly superior’ Fortnum & Mason Anchovy Relish, ‘creamy, less harsh, but more piquant’ and sold in ‘an exquisite china eau-de-nil pot’. It really is a superior spread, but has been unavailable for a while. We’re all praying for its return. In the meantime, you’ll still find it served on soldiers, at Simpson’s in the Strand, restaurateur Jeremy King’s magnificent revival of the original Strand grande dame. ‘My chef found and adapted a classic Victorian recipe for Patum Peperium,’ said King. ‘It is similar to mass-produced versions, but, dare I say, I prefer it.’

Another version, called ‘The Gentlelady’s Relish’, can be found at The White Hart in Wiveliscombe in Somerset. ‘Why should gentlemen have all the fun?’ asks proprietor William Sitwell. My fellow MasterChef judge was so devastated by the demise of Gentleman’s Relish that he asked his chef Dom Hewitt to create their own homage. ‘I’m delighted to share the salty love with my favourite magazine.’ The recipe is below.

Recipe: The Gentlelady's Relish

Makes a small pot, which is plenty for two on toast.

Ingredients

100g of anchovies in olive oil (don’t drain them)
1 lemon, rind and juice
½tspn cinnamon
½tspn mace ground
½tspn ground ginger
½tspn ground white pepper
1–2tspn capers, depending on taste
30g soft unsalted butter (optional)

Method

Mix everything in the food processor. The recipe gives you a lovely paste, much like the original version.

If you want it to be creamier, add 30g soft butter and it becomes more like a buttery spread.