The Utterly Inessential Shopping List: Whisky is coming, a hat to blow you away and shuttlecock swim shorts

Welcome back to our friendly neighbourhood round-up of the best wine, furnishings and completely, utterly inessential products available now.

It’s 2pm on a Friday. You’ve just finished the lunch you tried your hardest to draw out for as long as possible, you’re back at your desk but, it’s safe to say, your mind is not back on work.

Where is it? Now, that’s something only you know. Perhaps it’s on a cool gin in a crowded pub. Perhaps it’s on a warm bath and a glass of wine. Perhaps it’s not on alcohol because you’re a functional adult.

I like to think that it’s where mine is almost constantly: on those things which we, as logical humans, chose to produce for no reason other than the fact that we can. Things like these.

When a dignified dinner is on the cards…

Peter Reed

Dinner party idea: Contact the supplier. Arrange to have a full set of 52 made. Learn the interpretive meaning behind each suit and card number and match them to your group of friends based on their personality. Spend the whole party giggling behind your Queen of Hearts while Susan dabs at her mouth with the Two of Clubs.

Embroidered linen Playing Card cocktail napkin (set of four), £30, from www.peterreed.com.



Summer is coming…

Game of Thrones Single Malt Scotch Whisky Collection_Westeros Map Vertical

…and although I personally prefer to settle down with a nice G&T, one cannot deny the mastery of Malts in putting together this wonderful collection. Enjoy a Talisker in Pyke or an Oban in Castle Black and raise a glass to all the beloved character George R. R. Martin has inevitably given the chop in the upcoming season.

Game of Thrones Single Malt Scotch Whisky Collection_Bottle Design

Much like in Game of Thrones, there’s no shortage of attention to detail when it comes to these pairings; For example, the House Targaryen Cardhu Gold Reserve, spearheaded by Helen Cumming and her daughter-in-law Elizabeth during the 1800s when the whisky world was predominantly male-dominated, is fueled by the same fiery spirit of the fierce female leadership of Daenerys Targaryen, celebrating legendary women and their unwavering perseverance.

Buy your favourite house or purchase the collection before winter rolls around again (it’s already March. We don’t have all that long).

The Game of Thrones Single Malt Scotch Whisky Collection, £398 for the whole collection, click here to see individual prices from www.malts.com.


In honour of Cheltenham

Jane Taylor SS19

We’re not sure how long this hat (or any) would last in the gusts we’ve been getting lately, but I cannot think of a prettier item to float magically away in the wind.

Blush Straw Shaped Disk with Silk and Silk Organza Hydrangea Spray and Quills, £1080, Jane Taylor London, www.janetaylorlondon.com.


In honour of St Patrick’s Day

This chair would not look out of place in Graceland’s Jungle Room and if I’m honest that’s all I look for in a piece of furniture.

Astoria Armchair in Emerald Green Velvet, £399, Atkin and Thyme, www.atkinandthyme.co.uk.


Warning: Although this is in the ‘kids’ section, it is not for children

To tell you the truth, i”m relatively irate that I didn’t patent this idea the day that while in a hostel in Budapest, the home of the Rubik’s Cube, staring at a fairly crude painting of one on the wall, I idly thought to myself: “they should make one of these, but out of 18 carat gold instead of plastic and with 34 carats of rubies, 34 carats of emeralds and 22.5 carats of amethysts instead of stickers.” Hindsight is 20/20.

The real question isn’t why does this exist, but whether you would display this ‘fully functional toy’ solved, and thus only show two sides of glittering jewels, or display it unsolved and irk all of your OCD guests.

The Masterpiece Rubik’s Cube, for $2.5 million, from www.hushhush.com.


Shuttlecock Swim Shorts

Bluemint Arthus

Knowledge is knowing what pun to make. Wisdom is knowing when not to make it.

Arthus Badminton Swim Shorts from Bluemint’s SS19 Collection, £95, www.bluemint.com.


Bring it home, Harry

Le_Piane_273619692_469416852

This week is all about the revived Boca wines, the product of a tiny region where wine-growing nearly died out a few decades ago. Thankfully it did not, and the result is Le Piane 2012, a bright, deep-purple wine. Our wine chap Harry Eyres warns that it’s ‘not for the faint-hearted’ but what does he know

Le Piane 2012, £31.75, www.leaandsandeman.co.uk.


If you purchased our entire list this week you would have spent £2,033.75, $2.5 million (I apologise for the lack of currency conversion, I studied Classics not Maths) and gained yourself a new Game of Thrones watch partner. Have the car pick me up at 6pm.