Skip the election mayhem and buy your own White House with our handy guide

As an American citizen living in London, today of all days is always quite an odd one. The home of the free and the land of the brave (self-awarded) goes to the polls, to pick someone new to take the reins of the largest and most powerful democracy on the planet.

The President of the USA gets to do a lot of things. They get to choose the direction of the country, politically, for at least four years. They get to pardon a Turkey every Thanksgiving, for some reason. They represent the nation abroad. They become commander in chief of the largest and most advanced military in the world, and are handed the codes to about 3,700 nuclear warheads. They also get to live in the White House.

As much as we here at countrylife.co.uk would like to hand you the access codes to 3,700 nuclear weapons, we cannot. Our budget does not allow us to build a single nuclear weapon and, even if we did, we’d want to keep it, lest our competitors at House & Garden or The Field get a bit uppity. We can, however, provide you with a White House. Well, not the White House, but one that looks an awful lot like it.

With help from our friends at Knight Frank, we’ve got a list of, well, white houses, some of which match the vernacular style of 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue, which was designed by Irish architect James Hoban.

First up, for those looking for a White House on a budget, is this two-bedroom apartment in Cheltenham, Gloucestershire. It’s situated on the first floor of Regency Lodge, a Grade II-listed building in the popular area of Pittville Park. There are tall ceilings. There are large sash windows. There is also a generous driveway and a communal garden. A perfectly compact white house, for the agreeable sum of £535,000. Jolly good.

On the other side of the affordability scale is The Old Garden, which looks quite a lot like the White House and is almost as big. It’s on the River Thames in Richmond and our friends at Knight Frank have an asking price of £29.95 million. The property comes with 3 acres of gardens designed by Randle Siddeley, 20,000sq ft of living space and the main residence was designed by Quinlan Terry. A proper white house.

It was inevitable that something in Regent’s Park would feature on this list, and so it has come to be. This Grade I-listed Regency villa, priced at £20 million, offers 8,156sq ft of space, a private walled garden and a separate self-contained mews. A white house for the discerning city dweller.

Lastly we have Luckhurst, a white house for those more tempted by the countryside. A neo-Georgian home with grand proportions and ‘stunning elevations’, it offers seven bedrooms, 30 acres of gardens and grounds and heaps of ancillary accommodation for any visiting friends/family/foreign leaders. There is planning permission for various amenities in the garden, such as an indoor swimming pool and spa. Yours for £12.5 million.

So there you have it. A white house for each and every occasion. And considering the cost of running for presidency (about £11 billion, according to the BBC), much cheaper than the alternative. Although with fewer perks. But it’s a lot to handle, running the USA, isn't it? Best just buy yourself a nice house and leave the rest to someone else.

James Fisher is the deputy digital editor of countrylife.co.uk. He lives in London and has an American passport, but if you're ever lucky enough to meet him, you won't be able to tell

A breathtaking house and garden for sale that was created by one of Britain's greatest landscape architects as a playground for his family

Thomas H. Mawson, one of the 20th century's most renowned landscape architects, created this place for his family to enjoy.