'A flash of skull-print sock is my equivalent of a six pack': A snob's guide to socks

For some time now, I’ve been anxious about putting my socks on.

Am I doing it wrong?

The cool kids, I’ve observed — let’s say those under 30 — have their socks on show. Similarly, almost everyone in my gym wears their ribbed socks pulled up over their leggings, as if they’re in a 1980s Jane Fonda class. My anxiety is sparked because those of us that are millennial-aged grew up thinking that having our socks on display was lame and that our feet must be encased in little trainer socks which must, on no account, be visible.

There are, of course, chaps, often to be found in Brentwood on a Friday night, who insist on wearing their loafers without any socks at all. Meanwhile, Paul Mescal (30) is very fond of pairing his Gucci loafers with white ankle socks. If you’re a member of a gentleman’s club and of a more advanced age, you may wear them very high up indeed, albeit discreetly underneath your Anderson & Sheppard suit trousers.

So, what is the right way to wear a sock, these days?

Alice Hare, stylist and holder of very firm sock opinions, says that any sock which cannot be pulled up to the mid-ankle is merely the pretence of a sock. There goes my whole sock drawer, in other words, because it’s littered with trainer socks, aka little feet bags. What would happen if someone saw our sock poking over our shoe? Would the sky fall in? No idea. For some reason, many of us are fearful of it.

The good news is that, since socks on show are back, we no longer have to shuffle around with cold ankles. Or stop every now and then to hitch up a little trainer sock that has wormed its way to the toes. Women, Alice instructs, should look to the likes of Comme Si, Hermani and Pairs ‘for ribbed socks in party-at-your-ankles shades to wear with loafers and Mary Janes. Or head to Italian brand Maria La Rosa for the ultimate in status symbol cocktail socks — their pearl-trimmed red pair is all kinds of Wuthering Heights.’

A note of caution: these will set you back around £100 a pair. Cheaper, everyday ribbed pairs, says Alice, can be sourced, like so many items, from Uniqlo.

‘For the gold standard in proper men’s socks, as well as New & Lingwood and Cordings, Campbell’s of Beauly have a wonderful striped selection,’ she adds. Novelty socks, it should be noted, are never acceptable, although Alice does approve of New & Lingwood’s skull-print numbers (which regularly sell out). ‘A flash of the former poking out of a loafer when a man sits down is my equivalent of a six pack, in fact.’

Having recently visited the Pope’s sock shop, Gammarelli, while in Rome, I would add that this is another terrific place to buy immensely elegant, silk or cotton socks in a vibrant range of colours. Papal red, if you fancy it, but also in blues, greens and purples. They make excellent presents if you’re in the Italian capital any time soon, because the assistants wrap them beautifully in tissue and boxes. Although if you can’t make it to Rome itself, they also offer mail order. Dead smart, wearing silk papal socks, no matter how old you are.